Well, no. It's God. But close enough. You have crossed over to the other side. Prepare to face your final judgment.
Johnnie:
Judged? Oh good. I do well with judges.
God:
You have done good in your life, but you have also done evil. You enabled murderers to go free, pedophiles to molest again, criminals to return to crime...
Johnnie:
Whachu talkin' bout, Willis?
God:
Yes, Todd Bridges too. What have you to say for yourself?
Johnnie:
I was one HELL of a lawyer, wasn't I?
God:
It is ironic that you should mention that place. In light of the evidence, you will spend the rest of eternity in the fiery depths of...
Johnnie:
Your Honor I object!
God:
God.
Johnnie:
Pardon?
God:
Call me "God", not "Your Honor". You can go with "Lord" if you're more comfortable with that.
Johnnie:
Lord, I object.
God:
On what grounds?
Johnnie:
On holy grounds, of course. I will stand here until I am admitted into heaven. If I do not sit, you must admit.
God:
Are you serious?
Johnnie:
Serious, but not delirious. I will plead until I can proceed. I will procrastinate until I can pass the gate. I will contend until I can ascend. Can I get an Amen?
]
